Why do so many in the Christian Right and Corporate America take self-development seriously, but activists do not?

True North Groups: A Powerful Path to Personal and Leadership Development by Bill George and Doug Baker from the True North Institute is a remarkable book that presents a simple, well-tested method for conducting member-run, open-ended, peer-support groups that enable members to support one another in their self-defined personal growth efforts.

For thirty-five years, George and Baker have facilitated the formation of hundreds of True North Groups that have enabled participants to share their most important experiences, generally meeting for 75 minutes weekly or four hours monthly. Now George and Baker offer a user-friendly manual that any group of well functioning individuals can use to start their own support team.

They believe that “self-awareness is the foundation of all successful leadership development” in organizations, communities, society and families [and] “small groups are a powerful way of developing self-awareness.”

Unless we get frozen, human beings are social creatures who constantly evolve through their interactions with others. Alone, we are limited. We need the benefit of others’ opinions and knowledge as well as their support and encouragement.

Two minds are better than one and several are better than two. Hearing multiple viewpoints and giving and receiving open, honest, compassionate attention from others are invaluable.

Of particular value is support from peers – people we consider to be our equal who understand us due to similar experiences. As we mature, we learn and benefit from peers more than we do from authorities.

Making decisions about key transitions is often difficult. Staying true to one’s core without being seduced by ego-driven desires is not easy. Truly good friends can help us be the same person publicly that we are privately.

Yet in the modern world individuals experience intimacy with ever fewer people. Many have only their spouse or partner. Many others have no one.

The forces of modernization that produce this isolation are relentless. Obsessions with work and play overwhelm deeper impulses. Being honest jeopardizes climbing the ladder of success and can even threaten job security. People learn to be inauthentic and carry those habits with them throughout life

Finding greater intimacy generally requires conscious, intentional effort as well as building trust. Rooted in strict confidentiality, the True North approach seems to offer a great way to do so.

The True North approach does not involve authority figures training others with some pre-determined agenda. That hierarchical authority-based model fosters dependency, takes time to train the trainers, and is less responsive to the needs of the participants.

The horizontal peer model, on the other hand, empowers. It asks each individual to define his or her own needs, maximizes peer-to-peer learning, and can spread quickly.

For some time now I’ve been interested in finding or developing a simple support-group format that progressive political activists (including those who devote very little time to activism) could employ quickly and easily to help them be honest and open with another about their self-improvement efforts.

In addition to being inherently valuable, a project of this sort could be an organizing tool. It could enable progressive organizers to help grow activist communities by serving unmet needs. Historically, progressive organizers have connected with their constituency by addressing material needs. They could do the same with nonmaterial needs.

Many progressive political activists, it seems to me, could benefit from participating regularly in a small, member-run, peer-support group rooted in their common experience with activism.

The Christian Right gets it. As Malcom Gladwell reported in “The Cellular Church,” they’ve used this approach effectively in their community organizing. As one participant reported, “I don’t give because I believe in religious charity. I give because I belong to a social structure that enforces an ethic of giving.” Although “enforcement” may not be proper, commitments and accountability are surely valuable.

Now, thanks to the immensely valuable Berret-Koehler Publishers newsletter, I’ve discovered that much of Corporate America gets it too. Many corporate leaders realize that long-term effectiveness depends on personal development.

But so far, few progressive political activists have indicated much interest in integrating the personal and the political. Perhaps the success demonstrated by the practical, step-by-step True North approach can encourage them to take a closer look at the possibility of using intentional peer support to enrich their lives and strengthen their work.

Here are some excerpts:

Preface

True North Groups comprise six to eight peers who meet on a regular basis to discuss the important questions of their lives and to support each other during difficult times….

We believe there is a unique role for personal, intimate groups that differs from the multitude of groups formed for specific purposes. By providing a safe place for deep, intimate discussions about life’s most challenging questions, True North Groups enable us to become fully human and more fully alive, awakening to the enormous possibilities within each of us….

This book is written for you, if you are interested in forming such a group. Or perhaps you want to enable your current group to have deeper or more meaningful discussions about the vital questions of life….

Introduction: Finding Depth and Intimacy in Your Life

We need people around us to whom we can look for support and advice, who can help us develop as human beings….

The challenges we face these days are so great that we cannot rely entirely on ourselves, our communities, or our organizations to support us and help us stay on track….

We call these groups True North Groups because they help us follow our True North, (which) represents what is most important to us in life: our beliefs, our most cherished values, our passions and motivations, and the sources of satisfaction in our lives. True North is the orienting point that keeps us on track as human beings and as leaders. It represents who we are at our deepest level….

In the early years, they helped me recognize that I was trying so hard to get ahead that I was behaving very differently in my work and community than at home and in my personal life. That led me to “decompartmentalize” my life by attempting to be the same person at home, at work, and in the community—with less façade and more authenticity….

The counsel and support I received are not unusual for friends to provide, but the variety of perspectives that improves the judgment of our group and its collective wisdom lends the power of numbers to the advice….

Unless we have people around us with whom we can be completely honest and open, it is surprising how alone we can feel in our work, and even at home….

As one interviewee observed, these groups are a place to get frequent, 360-degree feedback from people whose motives you trust completely….

In recent decades, opportunities for personal development have proliferated,… While these vehicles provide opportunities for personal development, they do not address the gnawing need we have for depth and intimacy in our interactions with others….

Chapter One: True North Groups

At various times your True North Group will function as a nurturer, a grounding rod, a truth teller, and a mirror. At other times the group functions as a challenger or an inspirer. At their best, the members of your group serve each other as caring coaches and thoughtful mentors….

The trust of your group enables all members to be open and intimate, building on your shared commitment to maintain strict confidentiality.

In spite of significant differences in our faiths and beliefs, we have a common commitment to sharing our lives openly, respecting our differences, and discussing the challenges and difficulties we face….

Tom Schaefer: “It provides a moral compass, a way of checking on my sense of what’s right and wrong.”

We have a brief check-in to enable people to bring up anything significant in their lives. Then one of us initiates discussion of the program. Responsibility for leading the program is rotated….

Our group prefers having our members take responsibility for facilitating, to ensure everyone feels equal responsibility for the group….

On a regular basis, we take a check to be sure that everyone in the group is feeling satisfied and fulfilled. Periodically, we ask ourselves, How are we doing? Are we getting out of our heads and into our hears and souls?…

Chuck Denny: “We talk about our values…. Do we stay true to them under stress? It’s introspective, not just intellectual. What are we doing to make society better? How do we allocate time between ourselves, our family, and society?”

John Cunningham: “At some point in their lives everybody asks the big questions like Why am I here? What is life all about? What is my purpose?”

Ron Vantine: “We all have more questions than answers.”

Jonathan Morgan: “The group provides a venue for discussing existential questions and life’s mysteries that stretches the mind almost to the breaking point.”

We don’t think we are different from any eight people who genuinely want to explore together the important questions of their lives. What is crucial is the willingness of each of us to share openly, join in the give-and-take of a peer group, and listen in a nonjudgmental way to the challenges others face….

Small groups are certainly not a new phenomenon. We learned from our field research that participation in small groups is gaining strength… These groups are affinity groups whose members come together around a common set of interests or a common concern such as chemical-dependency, life-threatening illness, or loss of loved ones….

One way of categorizing small groups is by their degree of openness and intimacy. At the base of the pyramid are travel, running, cooking, or bridge groups, and so forth. People come together in these groups for an activity rather than for personal sharing. To the extent that there are personal discussions, it is independent of or incidental to the group’s activities. At the next level are book groups, study groups, and company groups that have intellectual discussions that occasionally delve into personal matters….

On the third level are Bible study groups, prayer groups, grief groups, therapy groups, Alcoholic Anonymous, and twelve-step groups that are affiliated around a particular purpose and share deeply about that area, including discussions of personal feelings, convictions, and beliefs. Many prayer groups and Bible study groups offer their members opportunities for examination of their religious beliefs and provide strong bonding around share values.

True North Groups, as described in this book, provide a forum for deep, intimate discussions of all aspects of one’s life, not only matters of belief and faith. These may include personal issues, such as family problems, leadership and career concerns, or healthy living, as well as convictions about a wide range of subjects. They are fairly unique in providing a safe place for confidential discussions of highly personal subjects across the full range of life’s issues, but without any particular affinity….

Malcom Gladwell…explains that megachurces adopted the cellular model because they found that “the small group was an extraordinary vehicle of commitment.”

True North Groups are not built around affinity models that provide the glue that brings them together and gives their members opportunities for sharing common interests. Our research confirmed that no prior bond is required for a True North Group; in fact, a diverse set of strangers is just as effective as preexisting affinity among members. They often have no particular connection except for the longing for affiliation, openness, and commitment to personal growth and leadership development.

In offering opportunities for deep discussions about challenges people face, True North Groups provide a safe place where members can discuss personal issues they do not feel they can raise elsewhere—often not even with their closest family members—and can explore questions about the meaning and purpose of life….